Boy, oh Boy, this time of year always reminds me how much i detest the snow and everything that comes along with it. Like many others of my peers, I've spent the last few days complaining about the horrible roads and weather conditions. This started on Friday, remember my post about going to Edmonton? Yeah, the weather continued to get worse...!! Typically, a drive to Edmonton takes 3 hours. It took me almost SEVEN!! 5 of those hours were just to get to red deer. After red deer, the roads were perfect! Not a hint of snow was visible anywhere in Edmonton so that was definitely a relief. The ride home had better conditions, but it definitely wasn't perfect, with road conditions gradually degenerating as we made our way closer and closer to Calgary. It was definitely a stressful trip, but the grace of God was really with us, and that was evident. We started off both trips with a prayer, inviting and asking for God's protection on the roads ahead. I love the calm and assurance I feel after prayer, just knowing that He is listening, and He will come through for us is the best feeling in the world. Recently I have been having a lot of conversations with him through the medium of prayer. Not necesarily because I want so much from Him. But because, I have so much from him, and I am filled with such gratitude and love for all that he has placed in my life. Every morning, I am thankful that He has blessed me with another day, and every commute I make, I pray for safety, and every destination I acheive I express my gratitude and thanks. So I'm sure you can only imagine how frequent these conversations have been with the turn in weather conditions! Aside from that though, prayer to me is soothing, and calming. It is an escape for me when I am feeling overwhelmed with emotions of helplessness and even happiness. I know I can turn to Him, because He was always there for me, and will always be there for me.
One thing I would like to work on however, is praying out loud in front of others. As of right now, praying is almost a private thing. I pray in my head, and feel almost vulnerable praying in front of others. Why? To tell you the truth, I think it is because being raised in a Catholic home, most of my prayers were memorized and easy to recite in front of others because everybody knew them. Having moved away from that method of prayer, I sometimes find myself overwhelmed and at a loss for words when giving thanks for the countless blessings God has put in my life. I guess I fear, that the loss of words, or pauses in my prayer may be translated into a lack of attention, or disinterest in my words? I don't know. It is really hard to explain, but it is something that I am trying to work on. I want to be more comfortable publicly sharing my love and gratitude to the Lord through the words of prayer, and I know only He can help me achieve that.
I'm not sure if this post makes sense, I feel like I've jumped all over the place, but that's okay. I've expressed myself to the best of my ability, my post is complete. :)
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